Intimate partner violence is domestic violence by a current or former partner in an intimate relationship against the other partner. It happens across gender, race, economic class, sexual orientation, and culture. 

 

It helps to think about as any behavior within an intimate relationship that causes physical, psychological or sexual harm to those in the relationship, including acts of physical aggression, sexual coercion, psychological abuse and controlling behaviors.

 

Anyone can experience intimate partner violence, but the majority of reported cases of IPV are from women in the United on a worldwide scale. The majority of perpetrators are usually identified as men. Usually, we don't see ourselves as being abused. Part of this thought pattern can stop us when we need to seek help the most.

 

Sometimes we may have negative thoughts about people who have experienced abuse. If domestic violence is discussed in our community it can be followed with language like, "I wish someone would do that to me, I would..."

 

When we think of victims, we may think of people who are naive and who aren't strong.  When we compare ourselves to people we think fit the term victim, we immediately think about how strong we are. Whether you think of yourself as a victim or not, if you are experiencing behavior from your partner that matches the behavior listed below, your safety is of the highest concern.

 

The 5 types of Intimate Partner Violence

 

• IPV can present itself in many different ways. Emotional violence leaves no physical scar. This form of Intimate Partner abuse includes humiliation, insults, or criticism, and can be just as harmful as physical violence to our self-esteem.
   

• Physical Violence is where the partner hits (even without bruises), chokes, slaps, punches, or physically touches the victim. It's the type of abuse that most of us expect when talking about abuse. 
   

• Psychological violence is another less observable example of IPV that involves intimidation, threats, and causing fear in one’s partner.
   

• Sexual violence can range from unwanted touching and sexual harassment to sexual assault or rape. Reproductive coercion is another type of sexual violence. This is when a partner tries to control the other’s reproductive choices, such as by banning their use of birth control.
   

• Financial violence. This type takes the shape of financial control. A person may attempt to control their partner’s money or access to school or to their job. In doing so, the person can lead their partner to become completely dependent on them.
   

Signs to Watch Out For

Certain warning signs might help recognize if someone is experiencing IPV. When noticing the following behaviors in a partner, it may be time to take action:

• Physical aggression - They often slap, hit, shove, push or threaten violence.

• Lack of respect for privacy - They listen in on phone calls or eavesdrop on conversations.

• Unpredictability - Their moods tend to change rapidly and radically.

• Jealousy, suspicion or anger for no reason. 

• Controlling the time their partner can spend on activities. They monitor and control their partner’s activities, including whether they go to work or school, and how much they see their family and friends.

• Taking control of their partner’s money. They make important financial decisions with shared money by themselves, or they take their partner’s money without permission.

• Use of verbal threats -  They are not afraid to name-call, swear, and yell at their partner.

• Isolating from friends and family - They may limit their partner’s use of the phone, social media or may force their partner to stay at home.

• Minimize or dismiss their partner's feelings - They may also make their partner feel guilty or ashamed.

• Inability to accept responsibility for things. They often try to blame their partner or others for their problems.

• Feeling like everyone blames them - Feeling like no one ever hears their side after being confronted over his or her violence. 

• They threaten - They may threaten to hurt themselves, their partner, or their partner’s loved ones if their partner tries to leave. This is not a sweet sign of affection, it is used to control and keep the partner from leaving. 

• Forced sex/rape - They may force their partner to have sex – even if their partner does not want to.
  
  
   

• Learn about Abuse and Watch Survivor Stories

• What is a healthy relationship?

• What is abuse?

• Intimate Partner Violence aka domestic abuse

• Recognizing Domestic Abuse

• Violence against men & boys

• Domestic abuse +children

• Domestic violence programs in DFW

• What is a safety plan?

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